“There’s no such thing as work-life balance. There are work-life choices, and you make them, and they have consequences.” Jack Welch
From talking to and helping over150 women in the last year I know the BIGGEST struggle they have is hitting a work life balance. In fact to most of them the work/life balance is a LIE. It seems unachievable and something that they’ll NEVER achieve.
Imagine … having all this to fit into your day:
- Checking that the kids have their swimming stuff packed for after school
- Taking time off work to take one of your children to the dentist
- Sorting dinner for tonight
- Getting your mum a birthday card
- Finishing that board presentation for the BIG meeting this week
- Talking to your partner about your need for a holiday
And with that you’re meant to stay cheerful and cope with ALL that is thrown at you.
I Found it a HUGE struggle
I know when I worked in corporate world I STRUGGLED to keep the focus on me when work was really demanding. I launched BIG products for Vodafone and companies like that, so the nearer the launch the more manic business and pressure happened.
So ME first went out the window. I struggled to get to the gym or make the plans for the weekends with my friends. I’d just be focused on the launch and dotting all the is and crossing all the t’s.
^^^^ Meaning that I got less and less effective the more tired I got. It was really tough to have any sort of balance and that was with just me and no family to worry about. I still find it now, as I’m following my passion I could just work all day every day.
BUT you’re here to have a LIFE not a career.
It’s ALL a lie
In truth to me the work/life balance is a lie. We have our lives … our family, home and the passions of what we LOVE doing.
THEN we have WORK which is not separate it’s an important part of our lives .. no matter how we feel about it. I hope you do something that fills you up that makes your heart sign BUT that isn’t all the women I speak to.
It’s all about LIFE BALANCE … to find your own balance that works for you. To fulfil ALL the roles you have in your life:
- Colleague, boss and leader at work
- Partner at home
- Daughter, sister and relative
- Mummy for your children
- Friend for your closest peeps
- And YOU for YOU
^^^ That’s ALOT to balance out, yet they’re all important to you as they make up YOU and your identity and you want to give all those roles the respect they need. So today I talk about finding YOUR balance.
Oh and this is one I still work on for sure, I’m not perfect but today wanted to share what I have found works for ME.
- Find YOUR balance
Find the balance that works for YOU. It maybe completely different to a friend of yours BUT that doesn’t matter. There’s no WINNER, RIGHT or WRONG … when you find what works for you that’s YOUR balance
It could be leaving at 5pm on the dot each day and logging on again at home. It could be having a person trainer twice a week and then getting up 15 minutes early twice a week to get your exercise in.
All the roles you have make up YOU, so you LOVE them all for different reasons. BUT you can’t be EVERYTHING TO EVERYONE or else you end up as NOTHING to NO ONE.
Find what works for YOU and stick to it. Commit to making the changes you need to at a pace that is right for YOU. What feels GOOD and sits with your values? Let it flex and evolve as your life does so there might be times when you need to focus on WORK and then flex to focus more on HOME when you’re children more of you’re support.
That’s all OKAY and normal 🙂
2. Be in the MOMENT
Whatever you’re doing focus on that MOMENT and be present. Give it your 100% attention and slow yourself down to enjoy it and get the benefit of that. When you’re at home BE AT HOME. When you’re at work BE AT WORK. When you’re training at the gym BE AT THE GYM.
AND on top of that set boundaries. if you’re at your children’s school play, phone off and be there. The magic is in the moments and you don’t want to miss them. Try to compartmentalise as much as you can.
Keep the separation.
Technology can be amazing with this but also blurs boundaries, with phones now being ever present office of sorts. Use it to your advantage, dial into calls to save the commute on the days your children need you. Or use Facebook when the children are in bed to catch up with your coach.
3. Get ORGANISED
Sounds very DULL but it will HELP you find YOUR balance. You’re so busy that you have to make decisions on the hop and it’s STRESSFUL as heck. Question from your husband “What’s for dinner tonight”, sends you into a flat panic.
Spend a little time each weekend prepping for the week and getting plans in place for you, your other half and the children. An hour spent on the weekend with a cuppa can save lots of stress and hassle in the week.
For example you make 15-25 decisions a week about food. How much time and stress would it save to preplan meals a few days at a time and bulk cook?
If you can outsource things that take your time that you don’t love … is it worth thinking about getting a cleaner for example? Or can you train on set days and have your partner at home to look after the children?
4. Follow your HEART
To work so hard hitting that LIFE BALANCE you really need to LOVE what you do and your life. For example have you fallen out of love with work? Do you feel resentful and unappreciated? If you do, love and honour yourself enough to make a change.
Refind that passion for life and that make you diary reflect it. What makes your heart sing? Do you look ahead with dread or excitement. For me I’ve found my purpose, I want all women to know they’re ENOUGH and that is what I LOVE. So the time I spend on it is all worth it as it feeds my heart and love. You don’t have time to waste, life is too short not to feed your heart and love what you do.
So focus on what you love, get organised and then be in the MOMENT to make your LIFE BALANCE work for YOU.
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